You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Who died my cat blue again?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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