I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
I should never have to text my best friend asking if she eloped again last night.
Randomize
