Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
why do cheetos always look like penises
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Nobody cheats on THIS.
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
