i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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