just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Randomize
