Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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