chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
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