does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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