I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
Randomize