all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize