My cousins just decided to make a catapult to spread my Grandpa's cremated remains. I love my family.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
The bartender just told me he would have me face down in his pillow by the end of the night. I hate when you make me go to gay clubs.
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
Literally just napped at strip club. Don't know how long
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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