Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
