her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
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