just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
You know, be my cock's hype man.
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
Randomize
