I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Dude! We had to write our address on your arm in permanent marker so you wouldn't get lost. You just showed the cabbie your arm and he drove you! Nice guy.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
My brother is coming home and he is bringing a whole bunch of friends with him. I am making him a cake. What should i put on it?
"Open for business" or "I have condoms" would probably work
Randomize
