They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
Randomize
