So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Slap a cop in the butt for a felony charge. Check.
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
