Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Fuck. I have to get my shit together by lunch. Mission impossible.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
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