thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
I saved a sauce packet from taco bell that said "Free me" to use in my next break up.
Randomize
