I'm passing your future prison.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
Randomize
