ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
You crawled into bed with Bob and started whispering to him about produce.
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