I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize