I think scott just propositioned me for sex
My Higher Power is John Stamos
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
