You made me cry and you don't even care
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
Randomize
