She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
