any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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