she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
he tried to do a one handed cartwheel to showoff but knocked himself out cold. fuckin jagerbombs will kill that man.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Woke up with a girls naked next to me I had her thong on somehow.
Randomize
