doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Did we literally take a cab across the street
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Randomize