Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
high people should be assigned attendants
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
Just realized I chose a bacon cheeseburger over sex last night
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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