Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
I'll take care of you. Just let me pee on this old white person's car first.
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
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