TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
I'm stoned and just shared 4 cookies with this chicks dog
They're raisins though so they're healthy. No worries.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
Randomize
