Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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