She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
