No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Randomize
