i have a new swear word: supercalifuckaliciousexpialadamnit
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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