my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
