Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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