i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I think I just read the whole internet. Front to back.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Randomize
