idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
my nextdoor neighbor called me saying "um hey, your mom just stumbled into bed with me and my husband, can you please come get her?"
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
