you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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