I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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