Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
