is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
Ps there is nothing more humbling in the world than havin to watch cheaper by the dozen on the waiting room tv while getting the morning after pill at the drs. Nothing
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
