What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Randomize
