I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
My apartment stinks of burning failure
Randomize
