On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
