in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
After she threw up on my floor she started singing "this is why I'm hot."
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
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