Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
She sucks. And I almost hooked up with a clown last night
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
So I just went to clothing optional bar
My one night stand asked me out to dinner. When he came to pick me up I got in the back seat. I thought he sent an uber. Awkward.
Getting high with your mom, but thinking of you!
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