Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
Randomize
