she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
