I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
If you're fucking that other dude, I'll take the sloppy seconds. I don't care.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
Randomize
